BMW
 | |
| Motto | "Fuck Goons" |
|---|---|
| Predecessor | COMMUNISM GM FORD |
| Successor | WTT |
| Formation | May 25, 2015 |
| Founder | See Founders |
| Extinction | September 15, 2017 |
| Status | Rebranded to WrongThinkTank |
| Website | fuckgoons |
BMW was the central group of the WIDEVERSE after COMMUNISMs decline in 2015. Initially formed as a Rust group from SomethingAwful, BMW grew into a prosperous gaming group and Mongolian troll farm. BMW rebranded to WrongThink Tank in 2017, before shortening it to WTT in 2018, then completely abandoning that brand and renaming to Wideboys in 2021. Though BMW lives on directly in WIDEBOYS, for the sake of historical record the group is considered to be defunct.
History
Formation
BMW began at the end of the life span of the Goon run Rust server era. Bishyaler and Shadowgate merged their servers in April 2015 to create Goon Playground. The two largest clans on the server at the time were GM and FORD who had been at odds for months, trading raids and feuding in the SA Rust thread. The tipping point came after GAY and WU-TANG joined the server and GM launched its biggest raid on the FORD northern base. Many of FORDs members expressed disinterest in continuing to play since GM had become a monopoly on the server. After GM launched a massive raid on the WU-TANG base, the situation reached a peak. A mass of people, including GM, agreed that the server with its current population of just Goons and no pubbies was unsustainable. The decision was made to leave the server for several wipes to allow a pubbie userbase to grow. At this time, many new players were expressing interest in Rust, but had no desire to play with Goons against other Goons. Capitaler began floating the idea to create a massive Goon rush clan on a public modded server. Ideas were tossed around on what to name this new clan, with some idiot suggesting CARS, but the idea that since the group was going into a foreign land, it should be named after a foreign car company. Also, the joke from GM about Rejdukien and his German engineering. Cal Worthington landed on the name BMW, and the next wipe, BMW was created. GM, FORD, WU-TANG, and GAY all merged into one group using Woofingtons Mumble as a meeting spot.
2015
The leaders of GM and FORD with Capitaler became the immediate leaders of BMW. They decided to move to the modded Rust server ran by YouTuber, PsiSyndicate. BMW immediatly adopted many of the strategies from all the aforementioned clans, such as GMs DREADFORT and FORDs sprawling base design which was itself influenced by Legacy Rusts DETROIT. The result was an impressive display of autism that only Goons can accomplish.
The first two wipes were rough for BMW. As many new people joined, leading and keeping the cats wrangled proved to be tough. the DREADFORT was raided and cored multiple times, as were the outlying structures of the compound. However, as many streamers revealed to us, raiding the DREADFORT was no easy task, and many people only managed immense exterior damage without every actually getting any loot. As such, the group was always able to bounce back quickly and continue playing.
BMWs run on the server however came to an abrupt end when they were accussed of "stream sniping" ThatConleyKid who happened to both be a moderator and a friend of Psi. Kimsemus, the de facto leader of BMW and Taylor Swift, former leader of GAY, were banned from the server, which led to the rest of BMW quitting.
BMW chose Rusty Bottoms, another public modded server ran by Moegex. Following the old playbook, a DREADFORT was constructed in the snow area in the northern part of the map. Disaster struck the group almost immediately in two ways when a zerg rush by one of the larger clans at the time PANDAS pushed over the shitshack before the DREADFORT could be constructed, setting BMW back by a few days. Secondly, Kimsemus got a false positive ban from EAC, which prevented him from playing on the server. Capitaler from that moment on would become the new de facto leader of BMW. Despite early setbacks, BMW picked up speed later into the wipe cycle when they began targeting a streamer named Xyelz and starting targeting the larger players and clans, such as PANDAS, TSBS, and Jaq.
At the end of the first wipe cycle on Rusty Bottoms, a coalition of players and clans formed to create FUKBMW in a desperate all out attack on the DREADFORT. The attack was repelled multiple times, with the attackers making leaving no lasting damage to the DREADFORT outside of damage to outer walls. The coalition however is most notable for the infamous "toolbags" quote.
The second wipe cycle was largely uneventful. BMW stuck to the established playbook of basing in the snow. A few battles with KRAKEN who took over some outlying structures during hit and run raids and the infamous Turtle Raid.
Peak
On the third wipe cycle, Capitaler shifted BMW from desolate fringe basing to dominating the airfield at the center of the map. The move was highly debated and argued that it was unsustainable and BMW would fare better by sticking to the edge of the map and remaining obscure. The move however turned out to be hugely successful because of the implications of placing a giant base in the center of the map next to one of the biggest monuments on the map. BMW immediately began cultivating a reputation of having an iron fist because of its ability to constantly be raiding, its impermeability from being raided, and the infamous sniping duo of Rejdukien and Taylor Swift.
One clan did attempt outright to invade the DREADFORT on this cycle. HR launched an all out attack that managed to enter the first layer of the DREADFORT, but was quickly crushed by a pincer led by Kimsemus and Taylor. Ironically, the victory and the ensuing Youtube video of the raid is what led to the DREADFORTS downfall on the morning before wipe when TAYLOR PUT THE DOORCODES IN THE VIDEO JESUS CHRIST DUDE ARE YOU RETARDED REEEEEEEEE.
In a rare turn of events, the 4th wipe map didnt have an airfield. So BMW settled on a valley in the tundra area of the map. Cal Worthington had worked out a cease fire agreement between the former HR clan, now called SPEED, and BMW to avoid each other until the end of the wipe cycle. The wipe saw an increased return to play from Kimsemus and an increase of membership overall in BMW, which led to the formation of some of the largest roving death squads in BMW history. Also this wipe saw the increased instability of the Rusty Buttoms server. Xyelz struck against BMW in a last ditched effort before he and his squad left Rusty Bottoms. It, unsurprisingly, was a total failure when Xyelz and Dev bore deep into the DREADFORT only to run out of explosive and to be pincered by Capitaler and Taylor, ending the attack. However, the wipe ended abruptly when SPEED came in full force against the DREADFORT. The aforementioned server instability and general shitty design of Rust prevented BMW from counter-attack, turning the entire raid into a laggy slideshow shitfest. This marked the first and only time the DREADFORT was completely wiped in the Original Rust Era of BMW.
Wipe 5, like the one before it, did not feature an airfield. BMW chose to then build close to the oil tank in the desert. The compound of the DREADFORT began to expand during this time, with the return of one of GAYs signature features, FORT TAYLOR and Cynthia Dutch building a smaller dreadfort adjacent to the main fort. SPEED essentially disbanded after their leader Rigby, formerly known as Jaq, went on hiatus. However, it lived on partially under the leadership of Ashy. The wipe was riddled with bugs, such as the day one bug that prevented rockets from doing damage to objects and twig objects not despawning client side, creating indestructible buildings that looked like twig. Also, Garry, the developer of Rust, had taunted hack makers the week before, to which hackers responded by releasing a noclip hack that led to multiple bases being wiped off the map by hackers. BMW fell prey one of these hackers, and despite gun battling him for 5 hours, including a 25 minute reprieve where he was forced to log off and download an aimbot, the hacker succeeded in removing the DREADFORT.
The 6th wipe caught BMW unaware, as Facepunch released the update very early in the day by American time. The first day was then essentially playing catch up, forcing the building of two shitshacks before finally building a DREADFORT at the airfield. After the disaster that was created in the wake of the previous cycles hacker explosion, BMW leveraged their ways into Capitaler being promoted to admin of the server. SPEED continued to be a slight nuisance, with periodic guerrilla attacks against the DREADFORT that only succeeded in cosmetic damage. Tays Fetish Chamber would also make its first appearance on this wipe.
Being two months into the game, wipe 7 was decided to be BMWs last for several weeks to prevent burnout and allow the server to grow back from BMWs constant raiding. The DREADFORT compound was significantly expanded, with the inclusion of bases at the 4 cardinal directions, a FAUXFORT, and the return of a Goon Rust classic, The THUNDERDOME.
After that, BMW took a 1 month break from Rust.
On August 6th 2015, BMW came back for its 8th wipe. Capitaler and Taylor had little hope they could bring the full BMW force back, so expectations were kept low. However, despite starting almost a day late with only 6 people, BMW launched a massive raid on the group that had taken the airfield, successfully taking it and securing the site for a full fledged DREADFORT. Quornes got super drunk one night and walled off the entire airfield, which became a major controversy among the servers population. To add insult to injury, a deadly obstacle course was added to allow adventurous players a chance to loot the airfield, assuming they weren't gunned down by roving deaths quad and snipers. BMW further leveraged their position on the server to give Taylor admin at the end of the wipe. BMW spent the rest of August continuing to bulldoze the server.
Their time on Rusty Bottoms ended on a note of controversy however. TSBS had begun to reform towards the end of August. They, like BMW, had several admin members. However unlike BMW they were highly suspect in their use of both their powers and influence. The trouble began when BTK, and admin and friend of Moegex, accused several former members of SPEED who had allied with BMW of hacking into their base. However, Taylor was present during the raid in question, and was able to prove their innocence. BTK, unhappy with being unable to ban them, forced them to not be able to base with BMW, who on the next to last wipe had built their most impressive DREADFORT compound to date, including the infamous pubbie rooftop zoo.
The final controversy came in the last wipe. Incidents were occurring on the server that resembled the earlier no clip hacks, with many groups finding their loot had been taken without any parts of their base being demolished or removed. Taylor convinced Moegex to install a mod that tracked usage of cabinets and chests to try and find the culprit. The incidents almost immediately stopped, until the day before the update, a majority of BMWs explosives were stolen. Taylor began the investigation but found that the mod to track such thievery had been disabled, because of complaints of "lag". These complaints never seemed to have been voiced to anyone but BTK and nobody in BMW or others had experienced it. Regardless, TSBS launched a full scale raid on the DREADFORT as Taylor was doing the weekly tear down of the DREADFORT. Taylor and Capitaler continued to admin the server for several weeks after the majority of BMW had quit. Ashy however begun playing with Method Man, the former leader of WU-TANG, under the BMW name. Eventually however everyone stopped playing for the remainder of the fall of 2015. Complaints about Rusty Bottoms and its sketchy admins[1] boomed after BMW left
Hiatus & Return
Bishyaler offered to rehost the Goon server under the new name of THUNDERDOME (server). Capitaler gave up his leadership position because of multiple reasons, including he was in no way interested in playing on a Goon server. The project floundered but kept interest in Rust to a certain level.
Method Man went on to join with a server owner who tried to steal the name Rusty Bottoms pseudo-successfully and created a stable server, called Terminus, of his own.
Taylor, with new friends from BMW, went back to shitposting with his original group, COMMUNISM, who had been known as GAY in Rust.
The hiatus started winding down around the end of November 2015 when Taylor began recruiting Goons to start playing again on the server Method Man was admin on. The first attempt was a total failure for a multitude of reasons. First, many Goons were only starting to trickle back into the game. Secondly, the DREADFORT was poorly built and even more confusing to navigate than previous incarnations. That added with the changes to cold that prevented people from teleporting right after spawning prevented the turn around during raid attempts. Thirdly, a super established group known as NAMBLA was already on the server and had much more time and resources invested into the wipe. Finally, the wipe week coincided with the release of Fallout 4, a major hype for BMW. The LAPD Siege was also a contributing factor. The group died back down for a few weeks after this
In December, BMW was able to come back officially. They had moved from Woofingtons Mumble to a new program called Discord, still under Woofingtons "Reticulated Splines" name however. They began moving away from the concept of a single giant base to a more practical and hard to raid idea of a sprawling compound and several offsite locations to store goods. These changes proved to be successful in the long run, but Terminus was proving to be a shitshow of its own. The owner was found several times in NAMBLA bases we raided, logged out, and it was quite obvious he was very close to the members of the clan. He always looked the other way when NAMBLA did something fishy and would never look into numerous complaints about them. The final straw was when Taylor attempted to counter a raid against a miniDREADFORT Prude had built. Taylor had snuck across 5 map tiles to find the base, and immediately after arriving on the scene, was hunted down and shot, like NAMBLA had known right where he was.
BMW moved to ADOLFS, a modded server on a two week wipe cycle. It was almost the middle of the cycle when they came in, so the choices were few on where to base, but after the infamous 4 hour doorframe picking incident, BMW was able to secure a large enough site to construct a full-fledged DREADFORT. Resources were so abundant because of the gather multiplier that Rej took it upon himself to found the BMW Space Program. Wherein a tower was built as far as the game would allow entities to be placed. The DREADFORT was later leveled in the middle of the night when a group of aspies who were sitting on a giant stock decided to ree out and foundation raid the DREADFORT and leave an autistic manifesto in its place. A few Bimmers stuck around for the rest of the wipe to farm materials to strike back.
Adolfs also proved to be a laggy mess (probably in no small part because of the 100,000+ entities that was the DREADFORT) and was prone to crashing.
Newboondock was BMWs next stop, and would prove to be one of the more memorable servers in the post-Peak era. The owner and head admin was a furry, to start things off with. A few clans were already established on the server, but weren't huge threats, namely 306. The start was most notable because of the first big raid, which came from G-Mach figuring out that the persons door code was their birth year of 1998. The night after the wipe, the shitshack and foundation of the DREADFORT was sieged by Chinese exploiters who were using a teleport glitch to get into high external walls they had placed, where they could shoot out at people, but were unable to be shot at. Rejdukien managed to solve the siege with his famous "rocket dunk". BMW once again began hitting their stride, including a massive online raid against an island compound owned by SOS where BMW moved from base to base while defenders attempted to pick them off, eventually taking the main giant tower and forcing SOS to log off.
306 began ramping up their attacks against BMW. They had started earlier in the wipe by building small sniping towers and losing in sniping battles against BMW. They grew ambitious and built a giant tower right next to the DREADFORT. Taylor countered this buy building a giant 1x10 wall called "The Great Wall of Autism that blocked their view of the DREADFORT. BMW decided to take 2 weeks off for the holidays and shuttered the DREADFORT. 306 came along later and blew into an empty husk and tried to claim they destroyed it.
Bimmers spent the next few weeks screwing around once again on Bishyalers server, in what would become known as the GMFORD-GAY War.
2016
January 2016 was the first time BMW played on Rusticity. It at the time was a fairly active server with an owner who was bipolar to say the least. He frequently changed rules and mods and even gather rates, but the server was stable and at that point in Rust, that's all BMW could ask for. It was a rough start because of an influx of new people after the 2015 Winter Sale, but a DREADFORT was eventually built. Rusticity however was not short on other clans looking to take shots at BMW. The most notable being ECHO who came closer to online raiding the DREADFORT than anyone since SPEED, but was eventually driven back by a coordinated push from Peaches with an Eoka and Waterpipe and Cal Worthington coming behind cleaning up with automatic machine fire. However, they were able to get back later in the wipe via use of home commands and tower up to the roof of the DREADFORT and break in. Lev decided to go on a bender and announced he was shutting the server down the next week.
Taylor had the brilliant idea to return to Rusty Bottoms, arguing that its better the shady devils you know than the crashing laggy devils you dont. The push started pre-wipe, with the infamous "poverty raid" in which Taylor, Rej, and Jack went from sticks and stones to raiding a giant island compound within 2 hours of joining the server, mainly fueled by autism, bullshit, and poorly designed bases.
| “ |
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| — Taylor Swift on BMW: Fuck Goons (Rust, Wurm, CS:GO, Conan Exiles) |
Moegex had appointed a new admin in BMWs absence. He had played on Rust during the Peak Era and was no fan of BMW. Like Moegex and BTW, he too was shady and used his powers to his advantage. His crew rolled only 6 deep but within a few hours already had full kits, C4, rockets, and the rest. On top of that, many of their members were seemingly lagging in a way that prevented them from being shot at accurately, even two Bimmers dumped full AK clips into them at point blank range. Taylor took a few weeks off from frustration, while Bimmers went back to Rusticity (where Lev had once again changed his mind and hadnt actually shut the server down.) But like all servers and admins, Lev as well started being shady. On wipe day, he "accidentally" deleted the pumpjack that was nearest to the BMW base. Admins and mods then began kicking Bimmers who dared to question the act.
The next week, BMW returned to NewBoondocks, which had promised was on new hardware and would be more stable. At this point, BMW decided to move to exclusively using the DETROIT sprawling slums style of base building, a tactic that would prove almost too good. The wipe sadly saw Taylor have to step down as lead for an extended time because of technical issues. 306 immediately became the primary rival once again, however they spent the majority of the wipe unable to figure out where BMWs base was, assumed since they were looking for a DREADFORT that didn't exist. Ashy and Method Man spent the majority of the wipe doing 6 AM farming, until late into the cycle the duo spent the majority of the early morning boring into the main 306 base and wiping them. However, 306 was able to bounce back enough to hit DETROIT on the last day after Ozmiander told them the coordinates to DETROIT. Thanks Oz.
The 306 raid turned out to land BMW in some hot water, but not in game. Luckky, the leader of 306, snapchatted a picture of his face to Taylor, who then posted it in the BMW PGS thread. FactsAreUseless, living up to the latter half of his name, came into the thread claiming doxxing (mainly because of claims of doxxing that led the Griefing thread to be locked). Having hellowned 306, BMW geared things down again for a while and went back to Bishyalers server.
Cal Worthington, in his eternal quest to fuck with Xyelz, found that the latter was once again streaming and was on a server called Rusty Souls. A lightly modded server, Rusty Souls did not attract many Bimmers who werent excited at the prospect of farming for 4 hours for a small shitshack. The effort floundered, only resulting in a few scared faces from Xyelz at the assumed PTSD he had from seeing the name BMW.
The next server for BMW was called Uprising Prime. Back to more heavily modded servers, BMW hit a stride. Raiding out of a tiny shitshack on the fringe of the map, they were able to dish out an impressive amount of shit in the short wipe cycle.
| “ |
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| — Taylor Swift on BMW: Fuck Goons (Rust, Wurm, CS:GO, Conan Exiles) |
A few week of this effectively killed Uprising Prime. For once BMW was on the hunt for a server, not out of failure, but because they pooped the socks too hard.
EMPIRE was the next one. There BMW found a familiar face in a player named Hef, who played against BMW on an earlier server for a long time. Somehow, he managed to worm his way into Woofingtons Discord. This caused the leaders of BMW to readdress the Discord situation, and in a long overdue move, BMW created its own. This is where BMW really took off as its own community. EMPIRE ended up being a dead server.
For the 3rd time, BMW went to Boondocks. 306 was nowhere to be found this time, so BMW had complete reign over the server. However, 4 days into the wipe, the server began locking up for 15 minutes at a time. The decision was made to go back to Uprising Prime, which had regained a good bit of its population. Certain admins there were starting to get sketchy, so BMW astroturfed a Reddit thread complaining and got the sketchiest of them fired. Taylor got EAC banned from Rust a few weeks later, however. This effectively killed BMW in Rust for months.
Taylor eventually repurchased Rust and BMW tried to restart Bishyalers server, unsuccessfully.
In September of 2016, Lev, now named Lions, brought Rusticity back from the grave, again. BMW quickly became the powerhouse clan and was wiping entire sides of the map. In typical Lev fashion though, this lasted for all of 3 weeks before he decided to shut it down again. This time however, BMW had a plan. Taylor and Bishyaler got together and made a clone of the Rusticity server a few days before it went down, so on wipe day they brought the server up and immediately had 80~ people online. For some reason that has yet to be uncovered by modern psychology, Lev was enraged at this, and spent 100s of dollars on a botnet to DDOS the server, forcing Taylor and Bishyaler and move the server several times. The damage was already done, and the next wipe, no more than 30 people logged in on wipe day. This proved to be a massive blow to BMW, eventually resulting in several members and admins quitting. Rust again, for BMW, was dead.
Post-Rust
During the summer of 2016 during a Rust lull, Rejdukien and Jack began hosting and running an ARMA 3 server using the Exile mod after BMW had spent some time on pubbie servers harassing people and almost getting banned. The server was a huge success for several months, attracting many pubbies.
In late 2016, Future turned BMW onto the idea of becoming a Conan Exiles group. Conan was to be a game like Rust, but set in the world of Conan the Barbarian and featuring significantly more game play right from launch. Future created a thread for CE and began the hype train.
After the failure of Rusticity, BMW turned into essentially a shit posting mecca for the remainder of 2016, especially after the 2016 US Elections. No real pushes were made into games outside of a few meme and party games.
2017
Conan Exiles
January of 2017 was the release of the Early Access of Conan Exiles. Several hundred people flocked into BMW to play, excited at the prospect of being part of a good old fashioned Bimmer Rush. The developers of Conan Exiles had different ideas however, when on release night it was realized that not only servers have hard caps of 75 people, but clans were limited to 10 or 15. Considering BMW alone was fielding 40-50 people at rush hour, it was impossible for all of BMW to get on one server. Those issues coupled with the fact that the game was an optimized laggy piece of shit quickly killed any momentum the game had. Try as they might, the leaders of BMW couldnt find a way to get everyone playing the game together. Within a week, the game was essentially dead except for a few hold out groups lead by Cynthia Dutch and Snatch Duster.
For several months, BMW was once again in a slump. The major project they had built towards had failed. Many ideas were pitched, games were bought, but they all eventually failed.
SA Rapefugee Program
Around the end of summer, Prude began reaching out to forlorn GBS Goons, starting what was later called the SA Rapefugee Program. The program was almost immediately successful, recruiting many active users into BMW that boosted the Pol channels immensely.
WrongThink Tank Rebrand
BMW, being a copyrighted international brand, was a name that obviously couldn't be used forever. Given the new nature of the group and its aims, Prude floated the idea of renaming to Wrongthink Tank on September 15th. The idea was very warmly received (outside of a few smoothbrains) and the old branding was mostly dumped, outside of keeping the BMW color scheme and still referring to members as Bimmers.
However, some people in a desperate bid for relevancy, still try and claim the name. Real tough scene.
Members
Founders
- Cal Worthington - As leader of FORD
- Kimsemus - As leader of GM
- Taylor Swift - As leader of GAY
- Method Man and Jack are considered by some to also be co-founders, as well as Capitaler.
Leaders
Gallery
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